Day 4: Orphanage 14

This is it, the day we knew was coming and all were a little hesitant about. But let me tell you that God did amazing things on this day. Things I didn't see coming at all, but things that were reminiscent of the spiritual battle we are fighting day in and day out...

Some of you may remember from our last trip that we referenced one of our stops as the "sad orphanage." We noticed at a this place a heavy, deep sadness in the eyes of these kids that was different from the others. The care takers seemed to be short tempered and there were rumors of abuse by the director of both the care takers and the kids. It happened to rain this day last year and we couldn't get the kids to open up hardly at all. In general, it just felt kinda miserable.

So we did a lot of prep-praying. We prayed for God to open doors to their hearts, to bind the evil and darkness at work, to protect the kids and us as we talked to them, to defend His children, etc. We knew this could be a tough day, but we also knew that these were kids that needed a message of hope. So Paula read scripture in the morning, we prayed, and we sang worship songs all the way to the camp--all the way up to the doorstep, if you will. It was fantastic. I seriously felt like we were in a movie: angels flying next to the bus swatting off demons as we sang and drove our way into a layer where evil thinks it can make a home.  If you've ever read any Frank Peretti, I swear we just lived out a chapter or two! Anyway, we got there and it went much differently than last time. We got to again started the day with basketball, volleyball, soccer, football and the like. This got the kids laughing and we got a workout (ha!). This was our morning, along with a few crafts. Then after lunch we came back to do the scavenger hunt and spend some more time with them. It went wonderfully, considering what we thought may happen.

THEN the director decided to appear and share some things with us.  Before I go on, I will admit that I needed to repent for some of the thoughts I was having when I saw him and when I had to listen to him speak. But God was moving in me and maybe some others...   When he came out the kids and care takers lined up in straight lines as if they were in the military. We also were told to line up for him to speak. (Okay seriously, can you imagine what I'm thinking right now?!) We listened and he said some mumbo jumbo about how they start like this every day, and he stands in front of this flag to show something or other, and how it's good that we're there cause the kids deserve to be loved. At this point, I was probably the closest to going to jail that I'll ever be in my life because I almost laughed out loud when he said that. I'm not sure if he felt the need to show us what kind of ship he runs as though we should admire him for that, or why he even felt the need to come out since we didn't see him all day prior.  But my insides were angry. I felt sick to my stomach even looking at him and I wanted to cry for the kids. More on this in a minute...

After that Christian shared his testimony with the kids and I got to wrap up with the bottom line of why we were there: because Jesus loves them more than they'll ever know, even if their circumstances and feelings don't seem to line up with that. I told them that His love is what brought us there and that we've greatly enjoyed spending the day with them and will be praying for them. We began to say good bye to them and the ladies, and to wrap up the day. On our way out, I passed a care taker and stopped to say thank you for all she is doing every day with the kids. I told her we'd be praying, but as I was speaking something inside said pray right now. So I did. Anya translated; and it was fabulous to be able to pray over her like that.  I hugged her and left. But later, Anya came up to me a little teary and said that she was so grateful for that prayer because she had just buried her father two days before. I had no idea... Seriously God?! You are so amazing I can't even stand it!  I love it when He does things like that...

So on the bus I'm still feeling sick to my stomach and just angry about that man, I think his name is Genada. Some of us were talking and I just had a hard time holding back tears of anger. But again, something told me to pray for him. At first I hesitated cause I didn't want to. He hurts children; I don't want to pray for him. But that's exactly why it needed to happen. So as the bus drove out of the camp, we did battle for him, asking God to break the chains of evil wrapped around him; to convict him and call to him, etc. Through my tears and anger, we lifted up the one who needed prayer the most. It was prob one of the most difficult things I did on this trip. But that's what scripture says: love your enemies and pray for those who hurt you. After we said Amen we left the same way we came in: worshipping, singing "Mighty to Save." Seriously......!!!

God is a big God, and I have decided that even though the thought of him hurts my heart, I need to keep praying for Genada. I know He can save, so that's what I'm praying for. He won't force Genada to come to Him, but scripture says the prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective. So let's do it folks! Let's pray him out of the darkness and evil that's in His life right now.  I do that, and I also thank God for what He has done and is doing at that camp and in those kids through the kind care takers, for what He did in my own heart, and for allowing us in there at all. Seriously there is no reason, especially w/a director like that, that we should be allowed to have direct access with those kids and tell them about Jesus so out-rightly. I honestly believe that the battle is raging! I believe Heaven celebrated as the word of God was preached that day. Praise Jesus!!!

Day 2&3 w/the kids: Nicholski (or however you spell it!)

So here we go, undertaking yet a new way to reach the kids. For two nights we stayed at the orphanage with the kids--sleeping in rooms like they do, eating the same food, walking the same halls.... living their lives, sort of.

It was pretty incredible to stay with these kids. We were so excited about this for several reasons. For one, we were able to trade all the time we would have spent driving from our hotel to the orphanage, for more time with the kids. LOVE IT! This made for even more time to get closer to the kids and invite them to open their hearts to us.  Reason number two is how it made the kids feel that we could stay with them. I'm jumping ahead, but when we left the director of the place thanked us for being there and said that our staying at the orphanage meant so much to the kids because we saw them as equal. That we were willing to live where they lived, eat the same food, and not demand a "better" place to stay showed them our hearts, which was a good way to start.

When we arrived the director and a bunch of the kids were outside waiting for us. When Sasha got off the bus they ran to him and hugged him because they knew him from previous visits--oh the joy on their faces! That was fabulous.  :D  The kids were so great. They immediately helped us carry all our bags to the second and third floor without a moment's hesitation. I love that about kids--such sweet hearts down deep inside... After that, it didn't take long for things to get started. We spent a lot of time just hanging out and playing games: soccer, basketball, football, four-square, and whatever we could think of. It was awesome. And it amazes me how little the language barrier matters when you let your heart do the talking.

We spent the next day and a half doing the same and including crafts, games, music, scavenger hunt and of course our own version of the olympics. It was so great to watch the kids come out of their shell and be a part of the fun we were having! My favorite part was the scavenger hunt. For this piece, I get to lead a station that is focused on Psalm 51:10 and how God completely washes away our sin. I used the dissolving paper and it was so flipping fabulous to watch their faces as they saw it disappear!  I tell ya, that never ceases to be cool to me. lol.  But I loved this part because I got to tell each group about Jesus and what He did for them. Does anybody understand how cool that is?! We in the church talk a lot about reaching the lost and how people need to know/hear about Jesus, but in all honesty how often do we have those conversations with people? That is not just a conversation that needs to happen in Russia; we should be doing that all the time! And my heart was soaring while God allowed me to do that over and over on this trip.  Today in our staff meeting someone mentioned "the lost" and my eyes welled up with tears thinking about the kids/care takers who don't know yet. There is a part of me that wishes I could still be there telling them all that God has done in my life and can do in theirs..........

Anyway, I met some teenagers here that touched my heart in a way I can't explain.  There's just something about Igor that I can't forget.  When we were getting ready to leave I hugged him and told him I loved him and that Jesus loved him. He gave a me a good hug (especially for a teenage boy) and then I went on hugging kids and trying to get on the bus. But before I did, I see him coming towards me. He takes off the Hawaiian lay we gave the kids and puts it around my neck with a nod and a smile. I gave him a hug again and then he left. People, I can't even tell you what that little action did to my heart! Seriously it was all I could do to keep it together on the bus as we left. What's his story? Why is he in this orphanage? And what are God's plans for him?  Sigh...   Igor as well as Luba, Danya, Alexi and Vitalik... they are very special kids. God bless and protect those hearts!!! I hope I get to see them again.  <3

There is something to be said about having an understanding because you have been, done, or lived through the same thing as someone else.  The Bible talks about how we do not have a high priest that is unable to sympathize with our struggles, but one who has lived them. Jesus is not like someone who stands on the outside and wishes they could understand and say the right things to help us through our struggles. He knows exactly what we need and when because He has been there. He has lived what we are living! He knows what it's like to be tempted, to be hurt, to ache for the life that is to come....  Because of that, His love is different.  I hope the same showed true for us while we were with those kids. I hope that they felt less like an underclass leftover and more like desired and loved kids. I hope our being there was reflective of who Jesus is and how His heart for us is what drove Him to leave His throne and make a home in the dirt of this world. I pray that our faces looked a lot like Jesus' face those days...

Pictures from Intake hospital!

Wow!

So we are back to a place where we have internet. The last three days have been an incredible journey! I will try to re-cap as best I can.
Sunday morning we were able to visit the intake hospital. This is the place where children are first taken before they are put into an orphanage. We were able to visit with the children on a playground and also hold some babies! These children are in such a fragile state because they have just been separated from their family either because the family dropped them off or they were taken from the family. One little boy that I was able to play with came up to me right away and started telling me that his mom was going to come and pick him up. This broke my heart and I actually had to turn around and wipe tears away before I could play with him. Then I was able to go and hold a baby! The little girl I got was sound asleep and I guess about 4 weeks old - she slept the entire time - about a half an hour - and I just rocked her, sang to her, touched her face with mine, and loved her. I prayed that God would watch over her all of her life and that she would know that Jesus loves her so much. It was very difficult to leave the hospital...I was heart broken for these children and took me a long time to remember that God has them. Yes it is a broken, awful world that they are in the situation they are in to begin with but God promises us that He will never leave us or forsake us. He will walk through the valleys and the fires with us. I needed to lean heavily on this as we drove away and my heart broke for these little children who have no control over their circumstances.
Pictures will be forthcoming as the internet is spotty at best and uploading is a long process!
I will post more later about our time at the orphanage. I loved our devotion tonight which ended with 1 Corinthians 13:1-12. Most of us know this verse from weddings but we are applying it to the love we lavious on these children and the hope that we will light a tiny spark within them for the love of Christ!

The intake facility/#15

How could I have forgotten to talk about the intake facility?! Before the first day of camps, we got to go to the hospital that is also the very first place the kids go when they are taken from their homes or given up. Some of you may remember that last year we couldn't go in and see these kids due to chicken pox. This time was definitely different! We got to spend several hours with them and it was wonderful. I GOT TO HOLD BABIES!!!! These kids were so cute and so precious. The cute boy I got to spend some time with was named Tioma. When they brought him out he looked so scared. He held very still in my arms and then slowly laid his head on my chest.... Shall I say again, oh my heart!! By the end of our time there he was more relaxed and smiley, and for sure, I did not want to give him back. Luckily he was still smiling when I put him back in his crib and had to walk away. :)

The other kids we saw that day were of all different mentalities. Some playful and some definitely still stunned...even crying and asking for their moms. That was hard on the heart, but we just picked them up and held them while they cried. Sometimes that's all we can do while we say some prayers.


One thing we've realized is that even when we are longing to do more or hurting because we feel like we are more people leaving them, we know that God is a loving, gracious, and intentional God. He has a plan; and our short time with them is a purposeful time. I have to remember that though my heart is aching at good bye, His is smiling at the mainfestation of His love through us. That is a fantastic thought...

Pictures from Day 1

Pictures from Day 1 with Orphanage #2 and #19

Hi Mom! I  <3  You!

Day 1 w/kids: Camps 2 and 19

There we have it folks... day one complete. It was wonderful and difficult at the same time, just as one would expect.  It was so good to get to see children today. I just love smiling at them, tickling them, and talking with them about God's love!  We did lots of things today, many of which we will do most days this week including: a Bible story about the Good Shepherd (good job Jennifer!), volleyball, kickball, painting nails, a carnival for the youngs ones and a scavenger hunt for the older ones where they traveled "the world" to find truths about God and His love for them. We ended the day with an obstacle course and a testimony about how God took one broken life and restored it to joy and hope (way to go Christian!) Since it was our first day we had several kinks to work through; but as I was so appropriately reiminded, God not only works when things go right, He also(and sometimes more so) works when things are not as smooth as we planned (Thanks Joel!!!).

Over all it was just fantastic to see the kids smile and laugh and enjoy life. I'm not sure what their lives look like without people there visiting, but I know I love the look in their eyes while we ARE there.  :]  Today my special story is with a little girl named Vica. When I first met her I asked her what her name was and she didn't answer. I offered to help with a craft and if I remember correctly (and that's not necessiarly a guarantee after waking up around 330am and seeing some part of every hour until breakfast!) she didn't let me help her.  But later we were painting nails and I motioned to her as if to ask if she wanted her nails done and she agreed. So with no more words that "What is your name? and My name is..." in Russian we sat there together. When I was done she got up and left to go play.

After their lunch, we gathered with the kids again and to my suprise she walked right up to me, wrapped her arms around my waist and just hung on. Oh my heart... It was the sweetest thing!!  I looked around and told the team not to check my luggage when we left!!!!!

After our lunch, we returned for the rest of the days activities and I was suprised to receive another hug and another...  It is amazing to me how the love of Jesus can cross any barrier--even ones that seem so necessary to communication. I love this!
After a long day in the sun telling the kids as much about God as we can, we always get to the part where we have to leave.  We start hugging and waving and sometimes holding it togeher. I was snuck up upon by a young man who said my name (Hey!!) and also gave me a hug. Melted heart again...  I knew before I left I needed to find Vica so I looked around and I see here looking left and right and our eyes met--she came straight for me. We hugged one last time and I kissed her on her forehead, said good bye in Russian and got on the bus. 

Although I don't know why, I was suprised that I had to hold it together on day one. But let me say, I might have just brought her home with me if I could've...  <3


Our Bible verse for this morning is 1 John 2:27 where John talks about the people having an annointing from God and being bold about standing in the truth they know and acting upon it. So tonight I rest in that. Even though I wish I could do so much more and give and fix and take care of.... I know that what we are able to give and do here is exactly what God knows they need--that's why He brought us here in this foreign place and allowed us to have access to these kids and to speak freely to them about Jesus (something Paula says is unusual to say the least. But she reminds us that God can do all things, and this thing that God has allowed is definitely done so with a purpose and may produce fruit years down the road that we may never see. Amen sister!)

Thanks for all your prayers. Keep it up!
Peace in Jesus,
~Ellie